Tuesday, November 6, 2007

This garden is is moving on...

Autumn Garden

The cherry tree is always the first to drop her shriveled leaves
Littering the yellowing lawn
Her fruit, but a memory of what once was

Sunflowers once smiling tall and bold
hang their heads low from the weight of their dying blooms
saying goodbye to the sweet earth

The once long and slender iris' have given up
their fight with the weeds who
know they have won

As I pull each beauty from the dried soil
little grains of dust pass through my finger tips
reminding me of sand between my toes
and my need to feel earth I have yet to touch.
dlm 10/07

I gave this flower to a friend, but I'm sure it's fine to share it.
It was the last of the giant sunflowers and why it was so small, I do not know.

I think I started with this poem because it was the first day I really knew I would no longer be tending to this garden. My world keeps looking at me with sad eyes and wondering if I will be okay. I know I will be, although I am not sure what my future holds and this can be a little overwhelming, I know I am ready. It's time to end this chapter and begin a new one. I have no regrets about the life I have created for myself. Regrets are for mistakes and mistakes are only made if we don't learn from them, this I truly believe.

Fortune has been my friend... good friends, good family and a good life. Somehow though, I feel the need to experience more. Life rarely turns out how we plan or expect, and who am I to expect anything from a universe that has a greater design? I can not move on from this life I have created angry or with disappointment, although I can not deny those feelings are sometimes there. Instead, I try to look back with pride and fond memories and remember always to learn... no matter how difficult the lessons. Everything happens for a reason even if we can't see it. I know this is true, and try to live by those words. I will be okay world.... don't worry (especially you Dad). I am a strong woman, with a lot to offer this crazy world... and it, has a lot to offer me. The times to come will be another adventure, another learning experience.... because that I believe, is what my life must be about.

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